scio te ipsum

You call and I’m hot up my neck

tone raised,

throwing hands in the beer garden with my girl

saying that you could never —

but a few days later I am settled

and I find that video I made you

for your birthday almost a decade ago

I haven’t changed my mind

but I’ve softened

I watch it twice

and I remember how much I loved you

more than I remember how much it hurt

cruel thoughts, that actually, she could never

and I could never, again

it’s the love that only the young contain —

now, to ebb and flow in parallels only

two friends left holding love in their hands

but no way home

9710144:

There is love all over this home

shedded like cells on the floor

like our hair tangled up in the drain

impossible to ascertain belonging to who

It’s the light that’s left on, when you’re home late

Giving me the bottom shelf because I’m only little

Reaching in close when I pull back in shame

It’s the giving me space but coming in to tell me that I am loved before bed

You believe in fundamental aloneness

I believe in the tangling.

saad-the-creator:

(via juschillbaby)

voddxa:

(via juschillbaby)

unsettled in a nonspecific way

and it does not become about you

so i get my phone out and write that

(thus nullifying it,

in a way,

but not in one that matters to me)

it’s been a good few days

i just can’t sleep

or i could sleep if i tried

but i’m not trying

sometimes i feel that way about you

like i could get over it but i’m not trying

and yet i forget all the time

slipping away from me;

I just remain hooked on the writing part of it

makes for sweet poems

and something to do

in the middle of the night,

when I am avoiding sleep.

6sept:

(via juschillbaby)